I hope that I will age gracefully. Ageing gracefully, to me, is to be able to live my golden years in good health and with dignity, being financially independent, and without being a burden to anyone.

I believe all of us want to live our golden years in good health, both mentally and physically. We hope to have all our faculties intact. We want to be able to think, see, hear, speak, eat, and move well. I think having white hair (which is better than not having any hair), wrinkles, sagging skin, pigmentation, age spots, etc. are not important as compared to losing my eyesight or suffering from dementia.

As a senior, I hope to carry myself in a dignified manner, being gracious in both speech and action. Being a senior doesn’t mean that I should have an entitlement mindset. I have seen seniors cutting queues because they feel that other people, especially those who are younger, must give way to them. I can understand if sometimes they need to use the toilet urgently or they are really tired after standing for a long time. Some seniors also feel that other passengers must give up their MRT seats for them. They would glare at the “offenders” who are usually oblivious to their surroundings and show their displeasure openly. If they really need a seat, they could make their request known politely. Most people will accede to such requests albeit sometimes reluctantly and with an ill grace because they can no longer play their game or watch their movie in comfort.

Seniors could also be more tolerant and kinder to other seniors. I have seen two seniors quarrelling over the newspapers in a community club. Years ago, my mum boarded a crowded bus and she moved to the back to make way for other passengers. She happened to stand near a senior who was sitting down. That old lady had placed her small paper bag in the seat next to her. When she saw my mother standing there, she started scolding my mum in Cantonese and said that my mother should not think that by standing there, she would get that empty seat. It was embarrassing for my mum and she was hurt that another senior would behave in such an unkind manner towards her.

I hope not to be too eager and quick in dispensing advice especially if it is unsolicited. I hope that I will not behave like a know-all just because of my age. There are so many things which l still do not know and I can learn from the younger people especially new technology. I also hope to refrain from prefacing my sentences with “When I was your age, I……”

Being older doesn’t mean that I should not be concerned about my hygiene and appearance. I don’t want to look frumpy just because I am older. However, I will not try to be hip by colouring my hair in some outlandish colour or by wearing torn jeans, off-the-shoulder tops, short skirts, etc. I believe I can still look attractive in my age-appropriate clothes.

Being financially independent means having the financial resources to live comfortably without any money worries in my golden years. I don’t have to rely on handouts from the government, charities, family members, relatives and friends. I will have the financial freedom to travel, to buy things for myself and loved ones, etc. I also have the choice to stop or continue working. I have come across some seniors who are clearly unhappy with their jobs. Based on their attitude, I suspect that they are doing those jobs because they have no other options. A few years ago, I was at Raffles City and there was this elderly cleaner in the ladies’ toilet who was cursing loudly because someone had dirtied the toilet. She cursed that person and made disparaging remarks about her private parts. Then there was this elderly man who was clearing dishes at a hawker centre. He was scolding people eating there for giving him more work, slapping his dirty and wet dishcloth on the table, unconcerned that the dirty water is splashing into the food of those seated there.